Bricklayers accident report : true story - Urban myth for sure; old but still funny

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Ian-Mitch
Posts: 53
Joined: Mon Oct 09, 2006 2:09 am
Location: Hampshire

Post: # 23081Post Ian-Mitch

Printed in the newsletter of the British equivalent of the Workers' Compensation Board, this is a true story.

Dear Sir,

I am writing in response to your request for additional information in Block 3 of the accident report form. I put "Poor planning" as the cause of my accident. You asked for a fuller explanation and I trust the following details will be sufficient.

I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was working alone on the roof of a new six-story building.
When I completed my work, I found I had some bricks left over, which, when weighed later were found to be slightly in excess of 500lbs. Rather than carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower them In a barrel by using a pulley, which was attached to the side of the Building on the sixth floor. Securing the rope at ground level, I went up to The roof, swung the barrel out and loaded the bricks into it. Then I went down and untied the rope, holding it tightly to ensure a slow descent of the bricks. You will note in Block 11 of the accident report form that I weigh 135lbs.

Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I lost my presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope. Needless to say, I proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel which was now proceeding downward at an equally impressive speed.

This explains the fractured skull, minor abrasions and the broken collarbone, as listed in Section 3 of the accident report form.
Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley. Fortunately by this time I had regained my presence of mind and was able to hold tightly to the rope, in spite of the excruciating pain I was now beginning to experience. At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit the ground and the bottom fell out of the barrel.

Now devoid of the weight of the bricks, that barrel weighed approximately 50 lbs. I refer you again to my weight. As you might imagine, I began a rapid descent, down the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up.
This accounts for the two fractured ankles, broken tooth and severe lacerations of my legs and lower body. Here my luck began to change slightly. The encounter with the barrel seemed to slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into the pile of bricks and fortunately only three vertebrae were cracked.

I am sorry to report, however, as I lay there on the pile of bricks, in pain, unable to move, I again lost my composure and presence of mind and let go of the rope and I lay there watching the empty barrel begin its journey back down onto me. This explains the two broken legs. I hope this answers your inquiry.
Ian

Tommy
Posts: 357
Joined: Sun Oct 08, 2006 9:46 pm
Location: Stoke

Post: # 23082Post Tommy

I Saw something similar to that on Mythbusters on the Discovery Channel.

They tried to replicate it, but only mamaged to get the barrel to hit the dummy once in about 5-6 goes,
During these goes, when the barrel hits the floor, it just bounces,

Wiki Explanation

very simple simon
Posts: 44
Joined: Thu Sep 20, 2007 3:47 pm
Location: c/o The Black Pig, Staple, Kent

Post: # 23085Post very simple simon

the fellas name wasnt murphy was it?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jWeXpNyqOrU
New and improved...Mk. II...10% simpler...still called Simon!

Rich H
Posts: 884
Joined: Thu Feb 08, 2007 12:28 pm
Location: Reading

Post: # 23086Post Rich H

This is debunked on the 'Darwin Awards' website. Good gag though.

seanandruby
Site Admin
Posts: 4713
Joined: Mon Jun 26, 2006 11:01 am
Location: eastbourne

Post: # 23090Post seanandruby

written by pat cooksey 1969. Aka paddy and the barrel, the bricklayers song and why paddy's not at work today. very funny song that brings back memories of my hod carrying days. :laugh:
sean

lutonlagerlout
Site Admin
Posts: 15184
Joined: Fri Aug 04, 2006 12:20 am
Location: bedfordshire

Post: # 23091Post lutonlagerlout

yeah one of the first things we learned at college was the bricklayers song
still makes me laugh now
LLL :)
"what,you want paying today??"

YOUR TEXT GOES HERE

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