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Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2012 7:56 pm
by msh paving
WHO IS JACK SCHITT?

For some time many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt?

We find ourselves at a loss when someone says, 'You don't know Jack Schitt'! Well, thanks to my genealogy efforts, you can now respond in an intellectual way.

Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, who married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc. They had one son, Jack.

In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The deeply religious couple produced six children: Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt.

Against her parents' objections, Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout.
After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced.
Noe Schitt later married Ted Sherlock, and because her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known as Noe Schitt Sherlock.

Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they produced a son with a rather nervous disposition named Chicken Schitt. Two of the other six children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony.
The wedding announcement in the ne wspaper announced the Schitt-Happens nuptials. The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Horse.

Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world.
He recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.

Now when someone says, 'You don't know Jack Schitt', you can correct them.

Sincerely,
Crock O. Schitt

Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2012 8:05 pm
by DNgroundworks
:D

Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2012 9:59 pm
by local patios and driveway
Jack schitt? How about fanny schmeller?

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=nmwGFX5pgXw

Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2012 11:36 pm
by lutonlagerlout
if my grandad had not anglicised my surname i would have been born
tony schmerler

wasnt that a result? :)

the brickie i work with surname is junke

imagine the combinations?

the red barons

the flying krauts etc etc

ad nauseum

LLL :laugh:

Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2012 11:37 pm
by lutonlagerlout
Btw what happens when the schitt family meet an admirer they dont like?
"the schitt hits the fan?"
:O
LLL

Posted: Fri Apr 27, 2012 6:48 pm
by DNgroundworks
I have a shit surname......Noblett lol

Posted: Fri Apr 27, 2012 7:41 pm
by flowjoe
lutonlagerlout wrote:if my grandad had not anglicised my surname i would have been born
tony schmerler

wasnt that a result? :)

the brickie i work with surname is junke

imagine the combinations?

the red barons

the flying krauts etc etc

ad nauseum

LLL :laugh:

Ha, in my yoof in the early eighties i had a blonde flat top which sadly was about all i had in common with Dolf Lungdren, i was therefore known as `The Kraut` to the three plasterers i mixed for

Posted: Fri Apr 27, 2012 8:23 pm
by Mikey_C
the german section of EADS (the avionics/aviation company) I used to have dealings with, had a top boss called Gunter Craft, his german colleagues called him (without laughing) Heir. Craft first time I heard one of them say it over the phone I nearly lost a rib.

should everyone else not find this funny I would like to point out, engineers are a special bread and i HAVE ALREADY HAD TO MUCH TO DRINK THAN IS GOOD FOR ME. excuse caps can't be arse'd to go back and change them.

Posted: Fri Apr 27, 2012 11:42 pm
by lutonlagerlout
i admire you mikey it takes me till at least 11.30 to have too much to drink :O
my favourite one in luton(lot of aircraft technicians work here)
mickey !"£$%^& put a note in (an airlines ) tea room
"who has nicked my effing mag light?"
sadly a boeing 737 had to do a 600 mile detour as someones mag light was stuck in its Aileron
needless to say a missing torch was the least of mickeys troubles
LLL
I have worked with engineering types mikey and the craic is still there, its just different to builders craic
LLL :laugh:

Posted: Sat Apr 28, 2012 8:40 am
by Mikey_C
lutonlagerlout wrote:i admire you mikey it takes me till at least 11.30 to have too much to drink :O
I opted for a keith floyd style of cooking, which also meant I was drinking on empty stomach, I can't/don't drink much anyway!

according to most pilots a torch is described as a cylindrical object for holding dead batteries.

Posted: Sat Apr 28, 2012 9:06 pm
by ambient
DNgroundworks wrote:I have a shit surname......Noblett lol
are you related to george and melvin noblett ?

Posted: Tue May 01, 2012 8:58 pm
by DNgroundworks
We are originally from manchester, if their name is spelt with double t on the end then yes we are related, but not immediate family.

A little bit of useless info for you all, my great, great, whatever grandad knew Henry Ford and we exported model T Fords in kit form all over the world.....fancy that eh? Gone from super rich to super skint.......clogs to clogs and all that.