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Posted: Mon Nov 28, 2011 5:35 pm
by London Stone Paving
Was sad to hear about Gary speed killing himself. Obviously we never know what goes on in peoples heads but here was a man who seemingly had everything to live for. Young family, glittering football playing career, blossoming management career, universally liked and respected. What a waste, what an idiot, heart goes out to his family
Posted: Mon Nov 28, 2011 6:34 pm
by rab1
never noticed its the popular happy go lucky types that always seem to do this?. ???
Posted: Mon Nov 28, 2011 7:06 pm
by flowjoe
Can not see that he would do it knowingly, not with kids in the marriage
Maybe gone the same way as Hutchence or Carradine ?
Very sad whatever the reason
Posted: Mon Nov 28, 2011 7:19 pm
by lutonlagerlout
apparently he went for a meal with the missus the night before
obviously some bomb was dropped and he had enough
he always struck me as a total professional, never gobby always played to his strengths,that leeds team he played with were an awesome team
I hate to say it but if it was gazza or bruno you could understand
but with gary ,who knows
good luck to his family
RIP
Speedy 
Posted: Mon Nov 28, 2011 7:24 pm
by Hawk
RIP Gary, you were one of lifes nice guy`s
Posted: Mon Nov 28, 2011 7:47 pm
by London Stone Paving
lutonlagerlout wrote:I hate to say it but if it was gazza or bruno you could understand
I have thought for a while now that Gazza was going to be the next one. If it can happen to someone seemingly as stable as Gary Speed, whoever is next is anyones guess
Posted: Mon Nov 28, 2011 9:38 pm
by seanandruby
although i feel sorry for the guy and people like hIm, i can't help but get mad at the selfish act of suicide. It is the poor families and friends they leave behind that my heart goes out to. Each and every person who was close to him will be feeling some kind of guilt that they didn't see it coming, blame themselves. They to will be sorry but angry, especially his wife and kids. What did they do to deserve it?
Posted: Mon Nov 28, 2011 10:12 pm
by rab1
agree totally mate, my mate done it and has wife/kids were the ones that suffered. the wanker done it at the top of the stairs and his daughter was the one the that found him (aged 11) twat.
Posted: Mon Nov 28, 2011 10:15 pm
by Dave_L
Thats awful
Posted: Mon Nov 28, 2011 10:18 pm
by GB_Groundworks
he was on football focus saturday afternoon seemingly fine, so sad and yeah its the cowards way out.
poor family
Posted: Mon Nov 28, 2011 11:04 pm
by Bob_A
As regards cowardice not my words but I've cut & paste this from another forum (not paving related) and it certainly got me to rethink a few things.
It is very clear from some of the posts here that some people, and I'm not having a pop here, have no understanding of depression and how powerful and dark an illness it can be.
Depression takes many forms but one thing for certain is we can all look at it quite rationally when none of us, supposedly, are currently suffering from it. This is completely impossibly for a sufferer to do. Rational thinking is just not possible, the one thing you want to do is feel "normal" again but try as you might, it is simply not possible and sometimes, not all the time, your thoughts become so desperate, so low, so helpless, that you may consider ending it all as this is just about all you feel as though you do still have control over.
Many people seem fine on the outside but even in a crowded room these same people are all alone.
People will say really stupid things to you like "pull yer socks up", if they had a modicum of understanding they'd already realise that this is exactly what you want to do, but know you can't, because you've tried many times over already. Their stupid comment just adds to the desperation and lonely lost feelings that are tormenting you.
The downward spiral is very subtle at first but once you start it's a horrible dark avenue that you travel down, but when you do recover you do come out a stronger person.
I have no knowledge of Gary Speed nor why he took his own life, but I know this..............he did what he thought was his only possible course of action and never once did he believe he was acting cowardly.
He had his reasons, even though they were most probably twisted by the demons that haunted him.
May he rest in peace.
Posted: Mon Nov 28, 2011 11:49 pm
by lutonlagerlout
my mate did himself in in august,everyone blamed each other and then them selves,but the bottom line was he had had enough...
a psychiatric nurse told me they never do it when they are really depressed
its when they start coming back they find the "strength" to do it
it isnt knives or drugs that kill most young men in the uk, its traffic accidents, followed by suicide
what he has done although uncommon, is not rare
RIP
speedy
LLL
Posted: Tue Nov 29, 2011 7:13 am
by seanandruby
giving it so much coverage, will, in my opinion see a rise in the people taking their own lives. The samaritans will witness a rise in ''cries for help.'' leave it be now the family have suffered enough without seeing the news screaming out at them from every newspaper, t v news reports etc: i think we can all relate in some way to this story and feel the pain it brings.
Posted: Tue Nov 29, 2011 8:09 pm
by London Stone Paving
I know 3 lads who have killed themselves. They all hung themselves and they were all wasted at the time. None of the stuff going on in their lives was insurmountable. Drink has a big part to play in these things because if you are depressed booze will really accentuate the misery and isolation.
If all three had not done what they had done at that particular moment they would be living happy, normal lives now.
None of them realised what they had. Sounds horrible but I bet they realised what they had in the last few seconds and probarbly fought to stay alive. Sad, Sad waste.
Posted: Tue Nov 29, 2011 10:22 pm
by lutonlagerlout
i had 2 mates do themselves when they were 18 and 21,one had been jilted from his 3rd engagement in 2 years,he was a gazza type totally happy go lucky
the other was very morose most of the the time and he did a header off a multi storey
another lad tried to hang himself on millennium eve with guitar wire,his flat mate found him and got him down but he has severely removed function now,and doesn't recognise you
there is an element of selfishness as none of the families have ever really recovered,they smile, and say hello ,but there is a sadness that doesnt really fade as it does with normal fatality
LLL